Live Review: GWAR, 9:30 Club, 12-29-10

Ah, GWAR. For those of you unfamiliar with the Scumdogs of the Universe, well, it’s something you have to experience to fully appreciate. If you thought the KISS Army was for pussies, well, GWAR might be the band for you.

You never know what you’re going to get at a GWAR show, but you can rest relatively assured that it’s going to be fucking loud, offensive and wet. Newcomers might have wondered why the 9:30 Club, per standard operating procedure, opted to cover approximately 1/3 of the venue, including speakers, lighting and the bar, in plastic sheeting. Once the first fake blood fountain started spurting a whooping five minutes or so into the proceedings, that mystery quickly was put to rest.

The show actually started oddly last night, with the lights being dimmed and two full Black Sabbath tracks played before the band actually took the stage. With a stage show as elaborate as theirs, i assumed it was either a costume or blood cannon issue. There appeared to be some issue (a possible scuffle?) in the stage right green room, but with all that plastic tarping, it was nearly impossible to tell.

i cannot prove it, but i’m fairly confident that lead singer, ODERUS URUNGUS, just shouted “GWAR, GWAR, GWAR” for at least the first three songs straight. One, however, does not attend a GWAR show for the lyrics. One comes for the spectacle. And by my previous GWAR experiences, this Bloody Pit of Horrors tour actually was tame by their standards.

Yes, Sarah Palin was dismembered. Yes, Lady Gaga ate feces and then was herself disemboweled while her boobs spurted blood across the crowd. And i’m pretty sure there was some homonecrobestiality (with Black Dynamite as my witness, i never thought i’d use that word in a concert review) to go along with the gallons and gallons of blood and viscera that was pumped onto the audience. All that being said, it was by no means the most offensive i’ve ever seen these wonderfully sick puppies.

Musically, the boys stuck mostly to their thrash/hardcore/punk wheelhouse, but i have to point out that while waiting for the band to get in tune or something, URUNGUS started singing, “I got your picture. I got your picture…” That’s right, GWAR did a two-line “cover” of the Vapors’ “Turning Japanese.” And if that and a drenching in fake blood aren’t your idea of an excellent evening, well, kid, you came to the wrong show.

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