The Greatest Zombie Mix You Will Ever Hear–Part the Somethingth

For those readers who followed me from LET, you might recall the annual Greatest Zombie Mix You Ever Will Hear series.  Well, i’m far too lazy to figure out what numbered edition this is (fifth? sixth? Pi-th?), but that doesn’t mean we’re going to stop this undead train from rolling.  This year, i did try to go more beat-oriented, but that’s really up to the songs now, isn’t it?  For your Halloweening pleasure, kids.  Let’s have at it.

Because i don’t scrimp for you people, i only bring to you the finest editions of zombie break beats. I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHY THE TRACK TITLE AND BAND NAME NEED TO BE ALL CAPPED, THOUGH.  I HAD NO IDEA THE UNDEAD WERE HARD OF HEARING.

mp3: ZOMBIES (VIP EDIT) (FIGURE from his Soundcloud)

Though you might expect otherwise, this is not a song about zombie desserts.  It’s actually white boy zombie hip hop.  You know you want some.

mp3: Zombie Delight (Buck 65 from 20 Odd Years)

Anti-religious screed or song about an Hispanic dickhead?  You make the call.

mp3: Jesus Stole My Zombie Girlfriend (Zombie Girlfriend from Cheap Music)

Correct.  Those are pretty much the only three options.

mp3: The Living, The Dead, The Zombie (Princesse from Princesse Demo)

This electro-synth rocker is a positive step in zombie/human relations, if you ask me.  Why shouldn’t zombies have their own school dances?

mp3: Zombie Prom Night (Rich Beretta from his Soundcloud)

Unless the definition has changed or i’m missing something completely, the following track is completely devoid of the assumed titular character.  Perhaps he’s busy attending the prom.

mp3: Zombie B-Boy (Count Your Curses from Zombie B-Boy)

Personally, i’m glad the zombie got them first.  i’m the father of an infant son.  i can’t be worrying about MJ coming back and diddling my boy.  That just ain’t right.  To this day, whenever he comes on the radio, i tell him, “It’s OK, the scary plastic man can’t touch anyone anymore.”

mp3: Zombie Kills the Jackson Five (Remix) (TSSN from their Soundcloud)

It’s good to hear that even during the inevitable zombie apocolypse, two kooky kids can still find love.  Not to cast favorites, but this may be the best jam on this year’s list.  Quite probably because the band is Canadian, naturally making them better than most other peoples.  Remember when Mike Doughty still sounded good?  Is this the right place for a Soul Coffin joke?

mp3: Zombie Song (Dream Logic) (Entire Cities from I Hope You Never Come Home)

This metal instrumental clearly has the best visual imagery in its title out of all the tracks here.  Personally, i’m against animal cruelty, but i would go to a zombie rodeo.  Or a cowboy monkey rodeo, but that’s a different story entirely.  Right, Coop?

mp3: Zombie Rodeo Clown (Judgement Day from Peacocks/Pink Monsters)

Even necrotic brain feasters need a little techno.

mp3: Zombie Barbie Doll (Alice and the Serial Numbers from their Soundcloud)

And what formerly living scum bag doesn’t love a little punk?

mp3: Zombie Girl (Howlies from Stunned EP)

Title pretty much says it all.

mp3: Zombie Song (Beast Make Bomb from Skinny Legs)

If dat zombie wasn’t from Jamaica, then why would it be wearing that hat?

mp3: Zombie Riddim (Pablo Calamari from Riddim Killers)

To close out this year’s mix, we have an entirely non-zombie track.  It is, however, a Star Wars Halloween mix, and if that doesn’t float your boat, then get the fuck off my lawn.

mp3: Star Wars Halloween Podcast (Lucas Online from The Official Star Wars Blog)

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